Lufthansa, Business Class – CRJ-900: Frankfurt to Basel

Airline: Lufthansa Cityline
Aircraft: Bombardier CRJ-900
From: Frankfurt
To: Euroairport Basel-Mulhouse Freibourg
Departure: 22h05
Arrival:
22h40
Flight time: 35 minutes
Seat:
4A

My flight from Malta ends at gate A18. I now need to make my way through that depressing tunnel that connects the A pier to the B gates. The lifts taking passengers down to the tunnel at basement level are hopelessly overloaded, so I take the stairs instead.

Part of the tunnel is closed, hopefully for embellishing, but in this rat hole I‘m pretty sure that‘s a lost cause… at least there aren‘t that many people down here and I make quick progress.

As soon as I arrive at the gate, they make an announcement inviting all passengers who have been to China in the last two weeks, or to a country with reported cases of corona virus or who have a Chinese passport to contact the ground staff. I find this rather odd. While I understand that there is clearly cause for concern over the spreading of the corona virus, I still think it’s racist and rather awkward to single out the nationals of one country only.

In any case, once boarding begins, we go down once more into the bowels of the terminal complex and then take the compliemtary bus tour of Frankfurt airport to reach our aircraft, which is literally parked on the remotest remote stand, in the eastern-most corner of the apron.

Boarding is quickly completed and the flight is not full. The Business Class cabin has eight rows. Although there are only two people on row 5, behind me, and another passenger across the aisle from me on 4F.

There are two male crew in the cabin. Again, they make an interesting linguistic case study. The purser is obviously Australian. His German is very good and he only makes few mistakes with his declensions. His colleague is probably German. His English is fine, but with a slighly strange accent. Allegedly, he also speaks French, most of which, though, is incomprehensible.

As passengers board, they are handed a packed of almonds.

We make our way out to runway 18, which is at the completely opposite end of the airfield, despite the fact the threshold for runway 25C is only a few hundred metres away from our stand.

We reach the runway, stop abruptly and then turn back. Apparently, the wind has changed and runway 18 is no longer available. So we have to make our way back to the threshold of runway 25C and wait for a slot for us to open…

One hour and fifteen take-offs later it’s finally our turn to make our departure. The initial climb is very bumpy, but then very quickly we settle into the cruise and the crew begin their service.

For dinner there is small plate with a skewer of feta cheese, olive and cucumber, another piece of vitello tonnato wrapped around some leaves of rocket, and a few slices of melon. For dessert there a passion fruit mousse and more of the chocolates. By the time the crew clear away the trays, we’re already descending into Basel.

We land at 22h40, one hour behind schedule. Which is not so good, because it’s also around the same time the easyJet fleet based in Basel returns home. As a result, the bus heading into town tends to get very full. As we taxi in, I notice the KLM flight from Amsterdam is nowhere to be seen, which is strange and slightly worrying, considering it should have landed at 21h45. I suppose I should be alarmed, but that’s another story, I’m too tired…

Lufthansa, Business Class – Airbus A 320: Malta to Frankfurt

Airline: Lufthansa
Aircraft: Airbus A 320
From: Malta International Airport
To: Frankfurt
Departure: 17h25
Arrival:
19h50
Flight time:
2 hours 25 minutes
Seat:
2F, window on the starboard side

Lufthans currently operates three daily flights out of Malta. There is one flight to Munich and two to Frankfurt. The last flight leaves Malta at 17h10 for Frankfurt, which is nice because it gives you a full day on the day of departure.

At Malta airport Lufthansa has its own dedicated check-in, which usually opens three hours before departure. There are three Economy Class and one Business Class/First Class counters. In order to access the fast track lane for security and the La Vallette lounge, you need to have an invitation issued at the counter.

These days the lounge in Malta tends to be crowded no matter what time you‘re there. It is a nice lounge, though, and has a good selection of local snacks and drinks. And the outside viewing area is just brilliant!

Boarding for the Frankfurt flight is at gate 5. Lufthansa tends to park on the same position at the north end of the apron, which requires passengers to be brought to the aircraft by bus. Much to my surprise, there is a dedicated bus for Business Class passengers and Star Alliance Gold members only, which is very pleasant.

The Business Class cabin has six rows, and from what I can see, there are twenty passengers in the forward cabin this evening. On row two the seat pitch is generous.

We start taxiing out just as the golden hour begins in Malta. It’s that special time of day when the setting sun casts a golden light on the Maltese limestone. Be depart in a northwesterly direction, flying down the full length of the island before heading north to Palermo.

The crew on this flight are polite but reserved. And the purser’s enunciation when she makes an announcement is just strange, even in her first language… The service is pretty much the same as on the outbound yesterday, except with better food.

There is a small dish with a chunky piece of smoked salmon on a very tasty potato salad, some vitello tonnato with parmigiano shavings and some soft cream cheese on a coulis of bell peppers. For dessert there is some vanilla cream with strawberries and a small box with two pralines, but the chocolate is not as refined as the Swiss stuff.

En route we’re treated to a gorgeous sunset, until eventually the world disappears into darkness. It’s quite poetic to watch!

Our descent into Frankfurt, on the other hand, is very rough, with low clouds, rain and gusting winds. We touch down at 19h50 and make our way to the A pier, and by 20h00 we‘re pulling on to our stand at gate A18. I now have thirty minutes before the flight to Basel starts boarding.

Lufthansa, Business Class – Airbus A 320: Munich to Malta

Airline: Lufthansa
Aircraft: Airbus A 320
From: München Airport
To: Malta International Airport
Departure: 09h30
Arrival:
11h15
Flight time:
1 hour 45 minutes
Seat:
2F, window on the starboard side

The flight to Malta will be departing from one of the K gates, which is the Schengen concourse of Munich‘s satellite pier. The transfer by underground from the main building takes about two minutes.

There is a lounge on the K concourse, and this morning it‘s very empty. When Lufthansa opened its lounges in the ‚new‘ corporate design a few years, I thought they looked fresh and modern. But I don‘t think the design has aged well, looking at it now. Don‘t get me wrong. The lounge is in great condition and very clean. But the whole design seems slightly old-fashioned now.

At 09h00 I leave the lounge and make my way to gate K07, where boarding starts just as I arrive. It‘s a Saturday morning in February and Lufthansa manages to get the flight full. I count 24 passengers in Business Class. I‘m not surprised about Lufthansa but by Malta, and the fact that it appears to have become a year round destination. Forty years ago, when we emigrated, everybody was just trying to leave the island…!

The crew on this flight seem friendly enough. If I had to guess, I would say the purser is a Dutchman who has been in Germany for quite some time. At least for a linguist his accent is interesting.

There is no cold towel, no welcome drink or anything else of the sort while we‘re still on the ground.

The cabin is your typical European Business Class set up. The seats are exceptionally thin but sufficiently comfortable. There are no power plugs and there are no overhead screens either.

Once we take off, we turn south towards the Alps. Our flight is routing from Munich to Ljubljana and then along the Croatian coast to Zadar. From there we cross the Adriatic to Pescara in Italy and continue on to Palermo and finally Malta. It‘s an unusual routing for sure. But we have a strong tailwind, giving us a very short flight of only one hour and 45 minutes.

The meal service is from a trolley and every passenger is served their meal first. Once that‘s out of the way, the crew take the trolley back to the galley and then return into the cabin with the drinks trolley. I‘m guessing this is the most efficient way to do it. Because then they can just keep on going with the service in Economy Class.

The meal service hasn‘t changed at all since the last time I took this flight a year ago. And I really mean, not at all.

The tray consists of a small dish of smoked salmon on buttered pumpernickel, a bowl of cream cheese sprinkled with radish, a bowl with a slice of salami, parma ham and one stick of a bell pepper and some yoghurt with a few berries on it. The crew only pass through the cabin once offering bread, and seconds are obviously discouraged. Other than that, salt and pepper are absent from the tray.

The crew are efficient and clear away the trays promptly.

For the rest of the flight I nap, it‘s been an early start today. But then we start our descent, and suddenly I‘m wide awake again. I don‘t know how many times I‘ve returned to Malta since we left in 1979, but somehow the approach never seems to get old. Not for me at least.

We make a slight left turn and Malta comes into view. We pass Kalafrana and continue out to sea before doing a sequence of gentle right turns until eventually we’re lined up for a runway 34 arrival, bringing us in right over Birzebbuga, where I spent my childhood.

While there’s nothing overtly wrong with the Lufthansa service, I think it’s blatantly obvious that the airline is trying to save costs at every corner. Which is what pretty much every airline is trying to do these days. What I find problematic with Lufthansa though, is that they’re obviously trying to save money in all the wrong places. First of all, because I think the premium cabins are definitely not where the money should be saved. Secondly, what’s worse is that as a passenger you actually notice the cuts, and that’s never a good thing. Other than that, if an airline really has to rely on not having a small packet of salt and pepper on the tray, then they really must be in a very sad state.

But apart from all that, even if the airline isn’t really able to offer the passenger anything much in terms of the quantity or quality of the food that is served, that is still no reason for the service, such as it were, to be so indifferent and tired.

Lufthansa CityLine, Business Class – CRJ-900: Basel to Munich

Airline: Lufthansa Cityline
Aircraft: Bombardier CRJ-900
From: Euroairport Basel-Mulhouse Freibourg
To: München Airport
Departure: 06:30
Arrival: 07:20
Flight time: fifty minutes
Seat: 2F, window seat on the starboard side

It‘s just coming up to five o‘clock on Saturday morning as I make my way across the station square to catch the airport bus. Remind me, why am I doing this again?

There aren‘t many people about at this time of the night. The bus isn‘t very full either. So I grab a seat at the very back and desperately try to catch just a few more minutes of sleep.

At least that means check-in and security are quiet too.

My flight to München is boarding from gate 60, which is inconvenient because it means I shall have to pass through the duty free shop to get to the lounge – and I really do need a coffee right now – and then back again to board my flight.

Boarding starts on time. By the time I reach the gate there are only a few passengers left… ‚after-you-no-after-you-please-I-insist-after-you…‘.

As passengers step on board, we are handed a small chocolate biscuit sandwich. In Economy Class that is the full extent of the inflight service. But it is a very short flight after all!

The crew aren‘t exactly exuberant, but they seem friendly enough and a vast improvement over my previous experience with Lufthansa.

There are six rows of Business Class for a total of twelve passengers. And the cabin is full. On the CRJ-900 the bulkhead row on the port side of the aircraft is row 1. On the starboard side, the bulkhead is on row 2, because the toilet is located on what would be row 1.

The CRJ-900 is a dreadful aircraft, it‘s tight and cramped and the cabin colours Lufthansa went for are just drab, dull and dark. Not sure in what universe off-grey is not depressing and ugly… on the upside though, on row 2 the aircraft really is exceptionally quiet.

Once we‘re airborne and the fasten seatbelt sign is turned off, the service begins. First the crew roll down the aisle with the food trolley, dishing out the trays. Only after all passengers have their meal do the two flight attendants return to the galley to bring out the drinks trolley.

The meal is presented in a small basket with a checkered pattern, which is kind of cute. The basket contains a müsli bar of sorts, which is rather vile, a bottle of strawberry and banana smoothie that gives me heartburn before I‘ve even finished it, a few grapes, and a ham sandwich. As I said, it‘s only a short flight.

The cruise isn’t very long obviously, and very soon we’re already descending into Munich. Eventually, we land at 07h15.

The flight comes to an end on one of the few remote stands for the CRJs immediately next to the terminal building. So at least there will be no bus transfer and passengers can just walk straight into the terminal.

I now have two hours before my onward flight.

Lufthansa, Business Class – Airbus A 320: München to Malta

TRANSFER IN MUNICH

Lufthansa and its Star Alliance partners all call Terminal 2 home. The bus ejects me at the main terminal building. My onward connection to Malta will be departing from K09, which is the Schengen concourse in the satellite of Terminal 2. To get there, there is an underground shuttle that runs every few minutes and makes the journey across in slightly over one minute.

This is my first trip through the satellite and I have to say, I like it. It’s very spacious and despite the many travellers, the place is very quiet.

LOUNGE

There is a Business Class and a Senator lounge in the satellite. The Business Class lounge is not very busy when I arrive, probably because it is still early on a Saturday morning.

The toilets have apparently all gone out of order at the same time. So instead, passenger have to use the toilets in the shower rooms instead.

Other than that, it seems to me the lounge’s style hasn’t really aged all that well. It’s also quite small.

BOARDING

Before boarding even begins, there’s already a mob forming in front of the automatic gates. There is a separate gate for Business Class passenger, who are invited to board first, but it’s not that easy to get through with all the people milling about.

From what I can tell, it looks like it’s going to be a full flight this morning.

CABIN

There are four rows of Business Class on this flight, and twelve out of sixteen seats are occupied, which is surprisingly high. There also seem to be a lot of French passengers on the flight.

Leg space in Business Class is excellent. I’m sitting on 2F and I have ample space to stretch my legs. The windows are also nicely aligned for some excellent outside views.

CREW

There are two middle aged women working the Business Class cabin and they’re really excellent. Their service approach is relaxed but still professional. They interact with a lot of ease and charm with the passengers, which I think is indicative of a breed of usually senior flight attendants that have been properly trained but is sadly becoming increasingly difficult to come by these days.

SERIVCE

Again, there is absolutely no service on the ground. However, no sooner has boarding been completed, one of the crew members passes through the cabin offering nice fluffy pillows to passengers for some additional comfort.

We depart more or less on time. The flight time is announced as a quick 1 hour and 45 minutes. We take off in an easterly direction and then do a right turn to point us south. It’s a lovely crisp morning with good visibility. A perfect day for flying really.

The Alps look beautiful from above. They’re all covered in snow and some of the valleys are still shrouded in morning mist. It’s not a bad view to go along with breakfast.

MEAL

The meal service starts shortly after take-off. This time, the trays are delivered from a tray by one of the flight attendants. The tray has on it:

A sliver of smoked salmon on rye bread with mustard and dill.

Vanilla yoghurt with berries.

A small plate with a cream cheese with radishes.

Another small plate with salami and smoked ham.

A strawberry smoothie.

Butter and strawberry jam.

The crew also pass through the cabin with a bread basket. I’m starving, but I decide to just take one bun, given that my request for another when I took this flight a year previously did not go down so well with the crew.

Surprisingly though, the crew pass through the cabin a second time with a full bread basket that contains croissants as well as buns.

ARRIVAL

The weather stays good right up until we reach Sicily. From there on it gradually starts to cover up. The weather in Malta doesn’t look too bad though. There are some clouds in the sky but it’s mostly sunny and warm.

We land slightly ahead of schedule. Given that I only have hand luggage, I’m through to arrivals fairly quickly. I step outside and grab the X2 bus, which goes to St. Julian’s. The ticket price is EUR1.50.

CONCLUSION

If I’m perfectly honest, this flight was much better than I had expected. I think that partly has to do with the fact that Business Class was not entirely full. As a result, the crew were able to take their time with the service and tried very hard to make passengers feel comfortable.

Apart from that though, I do think it’s a shame how the service on Lufthansa on short-haul has been cut back to the absolute minimum. They’ve become as bad as British Airways – and I don’t mean that in a nice way! The flight was okay. But I wouldn’t go out of my way to travel Lufthansa.

Lufthansa Cityline, Business Class – CRJ-900: Basel to München

INTRODUCTION

I’m on my way to Malta. Tomorrow is the Malta marathon that I was planning on participating in. But it’s looking like that may not be happening after all. First of all, I have a collapsed arch, which doesn’t cause me any problems when I’m walking or running but all the more pain when I’m just standing or resting my foot. And apart from that, the organisers have announced that despite the expected gale force winds (!), the run is expected to go ahead as planned. But I really don’t think I fancy that.

But the flights are booked anyway, and I think it’ll do me good to go home, one way or another. The upshot of course, is that I’m going to have to travel with Lufthansa, which is rarely a pleasurable experience.

GETTING TO THE AIRPORT

My flight from Basel to Munich departs at 06h15, which means I have to take the 04h55 bus to the airport, which gets there at 05h09. Being a Saturday morning, the bus is still fairly empty.

CHECK-IN

The Lufthansa app works moderately well. It takes quite a while to load, but that might just as well be because of my iPhone or the connection, I guess. Seeing as I’ll only be gone one day, I’m only travelling with hand luggage.

LOUNGE & AIRSIDE

Basel airport has been a constant building site since the partial suspension of the Schengen treaty. And to be honest, I can’t help but feel that perhaps that was the main idea – to keep people in the area in jobs. And while there’s a lot of construction going on in the terminal building itself, more and more flights are shifting back into the small secured Schengen area that still exists. Apparently, Lufthansa or Germany have made it on to the ‘good’ list, so at least I won’t need to go through immigration.

The lounge is mostly empty, save for an English family with two boys. One of which picks up a large bottle of orange juice from the fridge, opens the lid and then proceeds to drink the juice straight from the bottle. His parents very obviously so couldn’t give a shit. Apparently they must have been raised on a farm too, just like their son.

So I wait for them to get lost, then take the bottle and chuck it in the bin.

BOARDING

Boarding starts at 05h55. There is a separate line for Business Class passengers and status holders and these are also invited to board the aircraft first.

Trying to get to the gate is a bit of a tight squeeze, because the passengers for the easyJet flight are already lined up in queue for boarding and ready to go.

CABIN

I’m seated on row 2A. I know I complain a lot about Lufthansa, but one advantage they have in Business Class, is that even on a puny little squirt like the CRJ-900, the seat next to you will always remain empty. And I also must say, the amount of noise up front is minimal. It’s quite calm and pleasant.

On a side note, row 1 is right opposite the door to the toilet – which might be unpleasant, especially on a full flight.

CREW

There are two cabin crew on the flight: a middle aged woman with a rather grating voice, especially at 06h in the morning, and a middle aged gentleman. I don’t think he’s German though, because his accent when he speaks English and French is nearly non-existent.

SERVICE

The one thing that always strikes me on European Lufthansa, is how the service has been stripped to the absolute minimum. There is not refreshing towel, no welcome drink and no interaction with the crew.

THE MEAL

The flight time is announced at slightly over forty minutes. The Business Class meal is served on a tray and passengers are served individually from the galley, as opposed to a classic trolley service.

And what a sad meal it is! The food comes on a small white tray which is decked out in a red and white chequered napkin, in what I can only assume is Lufthansa’s interpretation of rustic Bavarian country bumpkin chic.

On it is a nut protein bar, a small bottle with a coconut and pineapple smoothie, a yoghurt with cherry compote and a ham sandwich wrapped in paper. Apart from the fact that the meal really looks very sad and just screams ‘cost saving’, it’s also not particularly good.

I also find it somewhat awkward that they should put pork ham in the sandwiches. Surely, it wouldn’t hurt Lufthansa to use cheese or something else that will not immediately exclude or cause offence to people who will not eat pork for religious reasons or any meat out of conviction.

ARRIVAL

The flight passes quickly and eventually we land at 07h11. I now have just under two hours to make my connection to Malta.

We stop on a remote stand and then from there we’re bussed to the main terminal building.

Lufthansa, Business Class – Airbus A 321: Frankfurt to Malta

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INTRODUCTION
I’m on my way to Malta for this year’s edition of the Malta Marathon. I shall be running the half-marathon with a distance of 21.1 kilometres, which is in fact longer than the width of the island!

I confess I’m a bit of a wuss, I’ve never been able to bring up the cojones to attempt a full marathon. That’s still one for the bucket list. Others of course, like my friend the valiant M., probably do a nippy full marathon every morning, just to work up an appetite for breakfast…

But I digress. Again. So yes, last year I flew with Lufthansa via Munich and I must say, I was hardly impressed. But given my recent, rather positive experiences on SWISS, I figured I might as well give Lufthansa another chance. There’s also that fact that their schedule is the most convenient for my purpose.

GETTING TO THE FRANKFURT
Just to give Lufthansa a bit of a head start, I shall not regale you with a full trip report of the Basel to Frankfurt sector. Suffice to say it was not so nice. My biggest complaint is the aircraft. Those Canadair RegionalJets really are stinkers! Everything is really tight and cramped and the bins are simply too small for all the hand luggage people take on board these days.

LUFTHANSA BUSINESS CLASS LOUNGE ON CONCOURSE A
The bus from the aircraft to the terminal ejects me somewhere in the bowels of the A concourse of Terminal 1. From here I take the stairs one floor up and make my way to the Lufthansa Business Class lounge.

The lounge is nicely designed and very bright, using a lot of white paint and light wooden panelling. The views of the apron are quite spectacular too, despite those pesky stripes that run along the width of the windows.

It’s just too bad there hardly any place left to sit. There are people everywhere and I’m left wondering if all these good men and women really have nothing better to do on a Saturday morning than hang around an airport lounge. But it doesn’t matter. I only have about 15 minutes in the lounge before it’s time for me to head for gate A 36, from where the flight will be boarding.

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BOARDING
Only, getting to the gate may prove to be a bit trickier than I thought. The queue of passengers for Schengen emigration is so long that it’s blocking access to the A concourse, which is in the opposite direction from the non-Schengen area. But eventually, after a long stream of ‘uh…sorry…hello…’tschuldigung…was that your toe, sorry…excuse me’ I finally get through and reach my gate just as boarding is about to start.

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THE CABIN
Today’s flight is operated by an Airbus A 321. I am seated on 2F, which is a window seat on the starboard side of the aircraft. On this side of the aircraft, row 2 is the first row of Business Class, there is no row 1. Whereas on the opposite side there is.

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The leg space is excellent on the bulkhead row. Other than that though, the seat is very hard, with little or no cushioning and – and I know I keep saying this – the grey metallic finish of the panelling really makes the cabin look rather dark and gloomy.

In total, there are 14 Business Class seats on this service. Occupancy is at 50%, with six human beings and a rather regal looking feline who looks as though he owns the aircraft. And Lufthansa actually…

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SERVICE & CREW
The maître de is a woman in her fifties, I should say. What strikes me about her is the eloquence and ease with which she makes her announcements. It seems unrehearsed, but it comes across as being very polished, charming and approachable.

The service only begins really once the aircraft is airborne. Until then, unlike SWISS or KLM, there is no welcome drink, refreshing towel or anything of the sort.

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THE MEAL
Once the fasten seatbelt sign is turned off, the meal service begins. Despite the fairly long flight time of two hours and fifteen minutes it is obviously not foreseen that there should be a drinks service before the meal.

The meal is cold and consists of:

  • a very nice yoghurt, the content of which I was unable to make out, save for the slice of orange and the pistachios,
  • a plate of cheese,
  • a plate of cold meats,
  • a bowl of fruit,
  • a selection of buns and croissants that are served warm and nearly burn your fingers,
  • the bread is served with unsalted butter and Hero strawberry jam,
  • cream, sugar and a towl are also on the tray.

As the flight attendant passes through the cabin with the bread basket, she encourages the passengers to take as much as they like, insisting that there’s really more than enough. All in all, the meal is rather tasty and hits the spot nicely.

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ARRIVAL
It looks like it’s my lucky day today. Landings and take-offs are towards the north, which means that passengers seated on the starboard side of the aircraft are treated to a spectacular view of the island.

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The airport is fairly busy when we arrive, but seeing as I only have hand luggage, I’m already on the X2 bus to St. Julian’s within just 15 minutes of landing.

5 Star Airline – I don’t think so…
So what about my Lufthansa experience? First of all, to be fair, I think I should say straight away that this experience was by far much more agreeable to the flight from Munich to Malta last year. Where last year’s crew were a right bunch of nasty old witches, this lot was a more accommodating and willing to interact in a professional and friendly way with the passengers. On this flight I actually felt welcome, and not like I was a burden.

On the down side, and I know this is something Lufthansa has only limited control over, the experience on the ground in Frankfurt really is a nightmare. The airport is a rat hole, with long journeys by bus to and from the aircraft, seemingly endless corridors to walk along and people everywhere that make it difficult to get through.

The inflight product on the other hand, is something Lufthansa very much can control, which makes it all the more unfortunate that precisely this is the carrier’s weakest point. It’s not that there’s anything wrong with what passengers are offered on board in Business Class, it’s just that it’s quite obvious that every attempt has been made to cut costs. I don’t in principle think there’s anything wrong with that. After all, the airline is accountable to its shareholders. But even so, I think the passengers should never be allowed to see the cost cutting.

Other than that, throughout today’s flight there was a constant stream of passengers coming through from Economy Class to use the forward toilet. And quite frankly, I don’t blame them, given that the crew left the curtain between Business Class and Economy open throughout the flight and actually encouraged passengers to use the forward loo. Again, this is in itself not a big issue. But it certainly makes me wonder wherein exactly Lufthansa sees the selling point of its European Business Class product: it’s not the lounges, because they’re too full to be enjoyed anyway; it’s not the catering; and the seat is the same one they have installed in the back of the bus. Which leaves what exactly?

So in the sum of all things, yeah this flight was not bad. But honestly, if anyone at Skytrax seriously thinks Lufthansa is deserving of its 5 Star ranking, then I suspect they probably also still believe in Father Christmas.

Reaction from Lufthansa to my flight experience Ancona – Munich

Shame on you Lufthansa!

I’m on my way back from Ancona to Munich on LH1959. I am seated by the window on 6A. Across the aisle on 5F a gentleman is sitting on his own. The aisle seat next to him on 5D is empty. Once the cabin crew announce that boarding is completed, another guy appears from the back of the aircraft and asks the gentleman on 5F is perhaps he might store his large North Face rucksack next to him, seeing at the bag won’t fit in the overhead bins of the tiny CRJ900 and the crew have obviously not been particularly accommodating in assisting the passenger to stow the large bag.

But of course the bag is so huge that it won’t fit under the seat. And so the owner of the bag wedges it in, de facto blocking the guy on 5F’s access to the aisle. I worked as a flight attendant long enough and I think I travel more than enough to know that the reason they ask you to store your bags under the seat in front of you is to ensure they will not obstruct your escape path in case of an emergency.

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At some point Mr 5F tries to get out of his seat to get something out of his own bag in the overhead bin. As he clambers over the obstructing bag he nearly ends up falling on one of the flight attendants who happens to be passing. She looks down at the huge rucksack, smirks and then waltzes off. Quite obviously she either doesn’t realise that this is a violation of a safety rule or, she quite simply couldn’t give a shit.

The bag is still in the same place as we go thundering down the runway on our take-off roll.

Forty minutes later we’re already descending through the clouds towards Munich. The crew pass through the cabin to make their final cabin check. The same flight attendant walks straight past the bag wedged in between the seats and just ignores it. By this stage they guy next to me, who has also noticed the bag, is getting concerned so he uses the call button for the flight attendant. A short while later the purser appears from the front of the aircraft. He points out the bag to her and asks if that is seriously the way the bag should be stowed. She explains that her colleague must have missed the bag on her check. I then explain to her that the guy had nearly fallen on to the flight attendant before the flight and that she simply hadn’t done anything about it before take-off, to which the purser only replies ‘dann hat sie’s wohl vergessen’ – then she probably just forgot – in a tone of voice suggesting that this is all no big deal and I am only being persnickety. The guy next to me asks her what the cabin crew’s name is, to which the purser replies that she doesn’t know but think her first name is Lisa. Seriously? And then she walks away and eventually we land.

Surprisingly there’s a bit of a hold up deplaning because the owner if the bag is still waiting in the rear of the aircraft, while the poor gentleman on 5F is having trouble getting out of his seat because the bag, which is now stuck and obstructing the aisle…

I find this incident simply unacceptable from Lufthansa. I can accept bad service, rude cabin crew, crap food, delays, you name it. But safety on board is simply not negotiable. I appreciate that Lufthansa has to watch its costs. But if that means cutting down on crew training and compromising safety, then I think this airline definitely has a problem. Furthermore, the fact that the purser apparently didn’t know the name of her colleague is either a blatant lie and indicative of a highly unprofessional behaviour, or it highlights just how dire the training situation at Lufthansa is. If you don’t even know the name of the person you’re working with, what exactly does that say about your crew resource management?

Air Dolomiti, Economy Class – Basel to Munich

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INTRODUCTION
I’m on may way to Recanati on Italy’s Adriatic cost to attend a meeting on language training for the military. The best option for me to get to Recanati is to fly with Lufthansa via Munich to Ancona. In Munich I shall meet my colleague, the flying Dutchman P. who has rented a car from Ancona airport. Originally, I wasn’t going to post on the flights, seeing as they are in Economy Class and both are fairly short sectors. But…

CHECK-IN
I know I probably sound like a grumpy old bastard. A grumpy old bastard who just really, really dislikes Lufthansa on principle. But that’s definitely not the case. You’ll have to take my word for it. Honest, I’m not old…

In any case, it just struck me on this trip that Lufthansa keeps making changes to its frequent flyer programme and introducing new brands and new rules and fare conditions. One would like to think that all these changes and ‘improvements’ were introduced for benefit the airline’s customers. But that is hardly the case and while their new fare structure may make sense on paper, in practice it simply lacks transparency and leaves you with the sinking feeling that the customer was actually the last thing Lufthansa had in mind when the changes were implemented.

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I arrive at Basel airport about an hour before departure. Our secretary has booked me on an Eco Light fare with no check-in luggage allowance. But I’ve decided to take a small suitcase and a rucksack with me after all, so from my research on the Lufthansa website I’m guessing this means I’ll have to pay to check in one item, which is fair enough. Only, the website and the app will not allow me to purchase a checked luggage allowance. In fact, the app won’t even allow me to view my booking because it was done via our travel agent and not directly with Lufthansa.

Apparently, you can always pay for checked luggage at the airport when you check-in, although that is then quite a bit more expensive. So as I approach the check-in counter, I’m fully expecting the check-in lady to want to charge me the higher amount, even though I think it’s hardly my fault if Lufthansa’s website and app don’t work. Only, that’s not what happens. Instead, the lady explains that I am entitled to take both pieces into the cabin ‘because it’s such a small aircraft’. Is that even supposed to make sense to the customer?

BOARDING
Boarding is from gate 32, which is in the non-Schengen sector of Basel airport, seeing as the state of emergency imposed by the government of the department Haut-Rhin in France remains in place. The result of which being that flights to and from some Schengen countries, including the Netherlands and Germany, are treated, de facto, as overseas flights.

CABIN
Today’s flight to Munich will be operated by an Embraer 190 of Air Dolomiti, which belongs to the Lufthansa group and the Miles and More programme but is not, if I understand correctly, a member of the Star Alliance. The carrier operates a number of flights on behalf of Lufthansa. These are mainly wet leases rather than code-share flights, which is also why the Basel to Munich flight only operates with a Lufthansa flight number but not an Air Dolomiti one.

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The cabin design and seats are similar to those of the Lufthansa Embraers, with the exception that everything in the Air Dolomiti cabin is green.

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Another shot of my popular hairy legs, cunningly disguised as a photo to show off the seat pitch…

SERVICE
I am greeted at the door by a friendly young lady. The first thing she does, is to shove a small cake with a good dusting of icing sugar in my hand. Which is a bit unfortunate because I’m holding my suitcase in one hand and the rucksack, my boarding pass and a bottle of Coke Zero in the other. So I decline. For Lufthansa this means that in doing so, I forfeit my basic human right to be served a snack on this flight, because the service protocol does not foresee distributing food, no matter how insignificant, after take-off.

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Once we’re airborne, the crew do a drinks round with a full bar service. Here’s another thing I don’t get about Lufthansa: how can a large organisation like the Lufthansa group be so inconsistent and careless in the treatment of its own brand? Despite the fact that this flight is being operated as a Lufthansa service, the catering is entirely Air Dolomiti branded, which really does not make any sense to me at all.

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ARRIVAL
But at least it’s a lovely day for flying and eventually we land in Munich after a flight time of about 35 minutes.

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CONCLUSION
For a flight of only 35 minutes duration the performance Lufthansa gave here was okay. I was not expecting them to roll out the red carpet. But flying Lufthansa has become a bit of a pain, at least for me, because somehow you’re never really quite sure what you’re letting yourself in for. The website is not intuitive, the interface with other reservation systems simply doesn’t work properly, check-in online didn’t work and between the fees for check-in luggage, fees for reserving a seat and so on, the experience is really not very enjoyable.

And I really don’t see why the crew can’t at least wait for all passengers to be seated before distributing the snack.