Introduction

The friendly young man has asked me to stay in the line to answer a few questions about my ITA Airways customer care service experience. All I have to do is answer five questions by giving a rating from one (total rubbish) to five (stupendously stupendous). I mean, the young man was great, five out of five on all counts. I’m just not sure what to answer for “How do you rate your ITA Airways customer care service overall?”, considering that I had to call eight times, had to wait two hours, and was kicked out of the line seven times by the young man’s colleagues when I explained my predicament.

Originally, I was scheduled to fly SWISS from Zürich to Rome, where I would connect onto ITA Airways’ A 321 NEO LR service to Dubai. The NEO was the reason I chose this routing over the direct flight. However, two days before departure, I received an email from ITA informing me that my flight had been cancelled and I’d been rebooked. I was kept on the same flight from Zürich to Rome at 07h30 in the morning, which would get me to Rome by about nine in the morning. But then I would have until 15h45 to wait for an onward connection with ITA to Jeddah, and then a wait of two hours before continuing on Saudia to Dubai, to arrive at the ungodly hour of 02h35 in the morning.

Initially, I called ITA Airways to inquire if at least they could move my departure from Zürich to Rome from 07h30 in the morning to 10h50, which would reduce the transfer time in Rome to three hours. But then when the young man on the line proposed putting me on the nonstop service from Zürich, I figured I better not look a gift horse in the mouth and went with that instead.

Getting to the Airport

As usual, I’m taking the train to Zürich Airport. I catch the 08h33, which arrives at Zürich Main Station an hour later. They’re currently working on the track at Zürich Airport’s railway station. As a result, they’ve thinned out the service from the main station to the airport. I catch the 10h05 connection, which gets me in to the airport at 10h20.

Check-In

The airport is a complete zoo. What are all these people doing here on a lazy Saturday morning? Nonetheless, despite all the crowds, it’s surprisingly easy progress through the terminal.

The SWISS Business Class Lounge on the D Concourse

To avoid the queues at security, I detour to Terminal 1, even though I already have a boarding pass. My plan works because security is quiet here and quickly done. By the time I’m airside, it’s 10h32. My gate assignment will show at 10h40. Normally, I would just head straight down into the basement of the main terminal complex to clear security and then take the train to the E gates without a second thought. But for some reason, I figure I might as well wait eight minutes to be sure. And thank heavens I do because it looks as though the Dubai flight will be leaving from D26. I’m glad I waited because getting back from the E pier to the D pier is a major pain in my formidable rump!

So, instead I go through immigration at the B concourse and then make my way to the SWISS lounge on D, which is very similar to the SWISS Alpine Lounge I visited on my way to Athens. It’s very busy, which makes it difficult to take photos. So I just take one of the nice selection at the buffet and then take a seat in the back part of the lounge with a flat white in hand.

Boarding

The flight is delayed by twenty minutes to 12h50. Even so, at 11h45 the flight shows up as go to gate, which is a really bad idea because gate D26 is a bus gate in an area with limited seating. And when I get to the gate at 12h00, the display shows that boarding will not start until 12h15 as we’re waiting for connecting passengers.

Eventually, we start boarding at 12h05. But there’s no bus. So we basically end up just standing there hoping for better things to come… Eventually, the bus arrives twenty minutes later. I think this is the first time that I’m boarding a widebody parked at a remote stand in ZRH. But hey, you won’t hear me complain!

The Cabin & Seat

On the A 330-300 SWISS has a small Business Class cabin of two rows between the L2 door and the First Class cabin. Row 4 is the bulkhead row in a 1+2+1 configuration. Row 5 has a 2+2+1 configuration. I’m on 5K, which is a window seat away from the aisle, whereas on row 4, the second single seat is J, closer to the aisle and away from the window. I suspect that I must have been very lucky to get this seat, seeing as the cabin is full and I was only reprotected onto this flight less than 48 hours ago. Of course, 5K is right before the toilet, but being a day flight, and having noise cancelling earphones and earplugs, I don’t consider that an issue.

There is a square cut out at the bottom of the seat in front for me to put my boots away. It’s a nice feature and rather convenient too. On the down side, the seat offers absolutely no privacy at all. Which is particularly unfortunate on this flight because it means I have a front row seat of Mr. 4J in front of me behaving badly. It’s actually cringeworthy, to be honest. He’s rude to the staff and his manners are so bad they’re beyond belief!

Amenities

When I arrive at me seat, there’s a pillow and a good quality blanket, both of which I place in the overhead bin for some more space. The amenity kit is Victorinox branded. They’re the ones that make the original Swiss Army Pocket Knife. There’s nothing in it of any use to me, except for the earplugs.

There’s also a bottle of still water and a pair of earphones at the seat.

The Service & Crew

While we’re still boarding, the crew pass through the cabin with a welcome drink service. There’s water, Champagne, the SWISS signature cocktail alpine essence, or elderflower, which is what I have.

Eventually, we push back at 13h05. Our flight time is announced as five hours and 45 minutes.

The Meal – Lunch

The menus are distributed while we’re still on the ground. After take-off, the crew pass through the cabin taking orders for the first and main courses, and I notice that they’re taking orders according to passengers’ frequent flyer status.

The meal service starts at 13h45, thirty minutes after wheels up. The crew hand out scented hot towels. And shortly after, they appear again with the drinks trolley for an aperitif. I have the signature cocktail and a glass of sparkling water. With that there’s a choice of nuts or cheese.

Meanwhile, it turns out Mr. 4J is a Hon Circle member, which probably explains a lot. He orders Champagne. The cabin crew tells him it’s Jacquart Mosaique. To which he tells her, without even bothering to look her in the eye, that “I refuse to drink that. Give me sparkling water”. Come to think of it, the guy is behaving like a jilted lover. And I’m willing to make a pretty shrewd guess at what he’s playing at. Presumably, he’s hoping that if he behaves badly enough, the crew will relent and bring him a glass of the good stuff from First Class, what with him being a Hon Circle member. However, unfortunately for him, the flight attendant may be young, but she’s no push-over. She stays calm and is sickeningly sweet to him as she hands him the water. She moves on the my row, and I notice her charming smile seems to have suddenly become a lot more natural as she asks Mr. 5G what he’d like.

Before the actual meal service, the crew make a second drinks round and set the table. Much to my surprise, there are no trays. Instead, they first dress the table with white linen, and then place the cutlery, side plate and a small ramekin with butter on it.

There are two choices for the starter. I go with the salmon, mainly because it’s a creation by Tanja Grandits who runs the restaurant Stucki in Basel. Unfortunately, the dish turns out to be a bit bland. The ponzu gel is extraordinary and the puré is lovely too. But the salmon is just tasteless. The presentation is a bit odd too.

The crew make several rounds with the breadbasket throughout the meal service, and they have a nice selection of breads and rolls. I also notice that the bread is always warm, even after their third pass. There’s a small salad with boiled egg served with the first course, with a choice of French or Italian dressing.

The first course is cleared away and the crew pass through the cabin with the soup, which is served in a small bowl. Now this is something else! It has a rich, smooth texture and the taste is just divine. The truffle goes exceptionally well with the creamy celeriac. And it’s perfectly seasoned too!

For the main course, I have the pumpkin and chestnut goulash with Spätzli, which is another fabulous creation by Hiltl, a vegetarian restaurant in Zürich. This dish is so good. The paprika they used in it is definitely the good stuff. Underlying the spicy heat is a tart sweetness – it’s just excellent!

Once the main course is removed, the crew return to the cabin with the dessert trolley. I have the cheese with crackers and a slice of Tanja Grandits’ cake with lychee, black tea, and rose, which is one of the most unusual desserts I’ve ever had on a plane. The taste is elegant and subtle – a true masterpiece!

And then to conclude the meal, I have a coffee. From start to finish, the meal takes just slightly over two hours.

After the meal I recline my seat into the bed position and do some reading. I’m not sure I’d be able to sleep in this seat, though, as it’s quite narrow – especially around the shoulders.

I’d like to say the rest of the flight passes quietly. Alas, that is not the case. The two women on the twin seats on row 4 haven’t stopped talking since we left Zürich, and it’s the usual senseless trash. Meanwhile, the guy on 5G is determined to watch all of Instagram at full volume in all its brainless glory by the time we reach Dubai.

An hour out of Dubai, the crew make several passes through the cabin with sweet and savoury snacks. A while later they have warm cheese quiches on offer. But I’m still full from lunch, so I don’t have anything.

Arrival in Dubai

45 minutes out of Dubai, the A 330-300 starts its descent. We’re arriving slightly ahead of schedule, at 21h05. This is rather a pleasant schedule. The Air France or KLM flights I usually take arrive later, close to midnight, when the airport is even busier.

We land and taxi to our remote stand at Terminal 1. From there a bus takes us to the terminal building in seven minutes, mainly because we’re moving at a snail’s pace.

Conclusion

This was not a bad flight with SWISS. The two cabin crew serving my row were friendly and quite pleasant. The maître de was a bit questionable, but luckily I didn’t have anything much to do with him.

The seat is really not so good. In the upright position it’s okay. However, in the lying position it just feels cramped all over. There’s not enough width at the shoulder and in the box where you put your legs.

What surprised me in a very positive way, though, was the meal service and the catering. The whole meal was nicely presented and well paced. And apart from the rather bland salmon, the dishes were nicely prepared and tasted good.