The 25H Bikini Hotel in Berlin gets its name from the large complex of buildings it is integrated into. The 25H Hotel brand is associated with All Accor, although I’m not sure if they’re a full member of the hotel group.
Location
From Berlin Zoologischer Garten railway station it’s just a short walk of about five minutes to the hotel’s entrance. Bikini is the name of a whole complex of buildings. If you’re coming from the railway station, the hotel is the last building on your left, just before the entrance to the zoo.
Check-In
The lobby is on the third floor. The lifts that take you up are completely dark, because this is such a hip place, and the lobby is unnecessarily cluttered with what I can only describe as junk. In any case, the check-in is quickly done by some über-trendy young lady who couldn’t be more indifferent.
Staff
Staffing at the hotel is clearly kept to the minimum to keep costs down. Which also means, for example, that the room is only cleaned if specifically asked for. Up in the hotel’s restaurant on the top floor, the breakfast staff are a bit odd and clearly untrained. On my first morning, all the baristas are talking loudly with their backs to patrons, evidently to avoid having to do actual work. Instead they’re loudly discussing the costs of having a dog spayed… “ja, so ’ne Zwangskastration kostet schon mega viel…”.
Extra Large Jungle Room
I’ve booked an Extra Large Jungle Room on the fifth floor. The corridor leading to the room is windowless and completely black, which I’m sure is very stylish and certainly saves on cleaning costs, but is otherwise really just a bit annoying.
The collection of useless and annoying features continues inside the room. Starting with the fixie bike hanging on the wall. Considering that this is, supposedly, an extra large room, it’s quite remarkable just how tight it is. I daren’t imagine what size the standard rooms are.
The room’s saving grace is that the bed is rather comfortable and firm, and has a great view overlooking the zoo with its lush garden. I can lie in bed watching the sunrise.
The room’s main feature is an alcove off to one side of the main room. I just don’t get it because it looks like a huge waste of space to me and I’m sure there would have been many better usages of the available space that might have made the room feel less cramped.
The bathroom is kept in black as well. That seems to be a thing at this hotel. It’s quite dark, even in daylight, and clearly intended to be more gimmicky and Instagram ready instead of functional and practical. The shower rates moderately on the Knight of Malta shower test. Pressure and volume are okay, but there’s some spillage. Temperature control is good, though.
Amenities
For a welcome gift there’s a tin with nuts waiting for me as I enter the room. I guess it’s better than the fizzy candy they gave me at the 25 H hotel in Hamburg… other than that, there are complimentary slippers and bathrobes and the contents of the minibar are complimentary. It contains two bottles of water, beer, and Fritzkola.
For tea and coffee making there’s a kettle and a carafe to make filter coffee. The whole thing is a bit messy, although I will say that the coffee is rather good.
Dining
The restaurant is located on the roof of the hotel and has some nice views of the sprawling park and the zoo on one side, and the Kurfürstendamm on the other. For breakfast there’s an extensive hot and cold buffet. To be honest, though, the cold buffet doesn’t look very appetising. The cheese is all dried up around the edges, and the bowl of hummus also looks as though it’s been sitting there for a very long time. Other than that, this is one of those hopelessly hip places where they make your cappuccino with oat milk unless you specifically ask for cow milk.
Conclusion
As you may have guessed from my ramblings, I’m not impressed by the 25 H Bikini hotel Berlin. Evidently, the hotel has been designed to create that supposedly perfect Instagram moment that captures incredibly happy, successful young people living their best lives. Frankly, I think I would have preferred a more practical, spacious room and better staff.
I hate the look of this place.
No, I’m not a fan either, though I struggle to say what exactly it is that I find so irritating about the brand.
Irritating is the word. It’s this brand of try-hard hipster “chic” that I detest so. In Australia and New Zealand there is a chain of hotels called QT whose decor can veer towards this as well – particularly the dimly lit everything – and I loathe it. Why hoteliers think that people want to not be able to see themselves in the bathroom (of all places) I’ll never understand.
Tbh, it seems less trendy and more going for a theme (the zoo) and looking cheesy. Well, part of it, anyway, which doesn’t mesh well with the “trendy” darkly lit areas. The other hotel at least had a nostalgia theme which worked a little better, imo. This just makes me think “What if the Rainforest Cafe was a hotel?”, and not in a good way.
Yes, that’s true. I think what it comes down to is that the designers obviously wanted to create an environment where people can capture those typical Instagram posts moments of them having a jolly good time.
Irritating is a good word. That layout and the ‘buy the monkey downstairs’ is bizarre and annoying.
They also have Freitag bags (that are rather smelly) which you may use for the duration of your stay… and buy at the end of your stay because they’re so hip and trendy.